Self-explanation

I will occasionally read one of my old blog articles, to link a Nostalgia post, or from curiosity, or for "mental masturbation." Sometimes I'll land on one whose purple prose is too false-sounding and perfumey to tolerate; or one which has such a bitter and self-nursing attitude that it mortifies me. Or one that is much too self-disclosing. The thing is -- I know these flaws are destined to happen, because I'm not trying to write objectively. My intent is to present my inner terrain's take on subjects. To write objectively, "scientifically" – as if psychology were about extrinsic facts not feelings and subjectivity – would to me be the hideous height of incompetence. (There's more of that purple, or mauve, prose.)

It stupefies me that all the other psychotherapy blogs I've read do treat the client as a possessor of objective categories and disease entities. Depression is a "disorder," not the result of injury and repression in an individual person's life. Anxiety is a "disorder," not what happens to your child when his fears are poorly answered. Clients are reduced to their thoughts as their primary nature, as if thinking were not what our mind does to justify or run away from our feeling.

This is the reason for my difference: The lens through which a therapist sees the client is his own psychology, and his own psychology, which determines his understanding, is unique, history- and feeling-based, mostly pain-based. I am aware of this, and I use the material deliberately, observing my clients, observing myself, applying myself to others, applying others to myself. I believe other writers either don't know or believe this self-generativity, or do know but think they can and must escape from it for the sake of their professional standing and writing.

Consequently, their articles are light, generic, soothing, dully clinical. Take a read. You will see that you might be touched, but not stirred or shaken.

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