We take a walk through the paths and woods of Park of Roses, Clintonville area of Columbus. The client is troubled. Walking stirs up positive (survivor) energy, contemplative energy, and feelings that have been buried. These energies make us feel viable, maybe more than if we sit on a chair or couch in the therapy room.
Client: I’m talking with you, but I don’t feel
that I’m here. Of course I am; it’s
nice to be outside, in the trees. But at the same time, it’s a bad reality. I
want to grasp something – this branch – but I know I wouldn’t feel it. I want
to feel great, adventurous, when I walk solid on the ground. But I’m walking in
my mind.
Therapist: (a few more paces.) Let’s stop. Put
that leaf in the palm of your hand. Quiet your mind. Feel, don’t think.
C: (a quiet moment.) I did have some feelings. A potpourri.
But then a sad one. Why in the name of Crap would a leaf make me sad?
T: What would you feel if it was just you and that leaf?
C: (longer pause.) Oh my. I would fall into it, become green,
drown in it. (A bit wistful.) Can’t I do that?
T: I would welcome it. Try it a little longer.
C: (client stares at the leaf.) It brings me back to
childhood. (There are silences everywhere.) In all the soup of garbage, a few
good moments. . . . It’s not a feeling – it’s being. Kicking a football ten times higher than the houses.
Collecting a dozen honey bees in a glass jar then dropping it and running! Everything was crucial: looking at my
friend’s face, burning in the summer day, walking to the far foreign end of our
street where the strange kids lived. . . . But there was already something in
the way, something that pulled me into myself. Anxiety. A kind of depressed
fear. It made me pull back and leave things, leave everything, eventually.
This leaf is
sad. Or it’s the past.
T: Allow the tears.
- - - - - - - -
- - -
There are times
when I think walking therapy is the best way to do it. The client can never be
fully with you anyway, because she’s going to be lost in herself. If she’s going
to be lost in herself, she might as well be there within the world she has to
live in.
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Comments are welcome, but I'd suggest you first read "Feeling-centered therapy" and "Ocean and boat" for a basic introduction to my kind of theory and therapy.