Casual theory of ADHD

This is my theory of ADHD – “Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder” – as it is diagnosed, and as the symptoms present, in many clients I’ve seen.  These are people who cannot sit still on a feeling.  They squirm physically, they squirm and race and deflect mentally to avoid what will appear beneath the surface when the waters are calmed: emotional truth.  I remember a forty-five-year-old man – one of my strongest efforts and worst cases – who pranced and ran away from all feeling and insight every minute of every session for well over two years.  His parents had been abusive, shaming, cruel – he’d mention this during one or two of his severed-headed, jocular sprints – but he always ran and never faced it.  Now the pain remained underground and, like a planet’s magnetic radioactive core, weakened all structures on the surface, pulled to him a terrible marriage, warped the field in his brain to absurd attitudes and philosophies.  “Life” and “the universe” were to blame for his marriage, for his absence of success.  He raged over lost pennies so often that his children eventually made him invisible, couldn’t listen to him literally to save their lives.  Why couldn’t he ever – ever – still his mind and look within himself?  That would be to see the fire beneath the house – or skyscraper – of cards.  More accurately, it would be to return to childhood, which was the fire.

It can’t be hard to picture a small child sitting in class, fidgety (HD) from tension and spaced or distracted (AD) to avoid the feeling that life is wrong at home.  Next time you see this child, stop the damn world you idiot and listen.  Throw the clocks away, throw your adult crap away, and listen.